Economics

TRADITIONAL ECONOMICS: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies and the economy grows. You retire on the income.

AMERICAN ECONOMICS: You have two cows. You sell one and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. You profess surprise when the cow drops dead. You put the blame on some nation with cows and naturally that nation will be a danger to mankind. You wage a war to save the world and grab the cows.

FRENCH ECONOMICS: You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows.

GERMAN ECONOMICS: You have two cows. You reengineer them so that they live for 100 years, eat once a month and milk themselves.

BRITISH ECONOMICS: You have two cows. They are both mad.

ITALIAN ECONOMICS: You have two cows. You don't know where they are. You break for lunch.

SWISS ECONOMICS: You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you. You charge others for storing them.

JAPANESE ECONOMICS: You have two cows. You redesign them so that they are one-tenth the size of an Ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create cute cartoon cow images called Cowkimon and Market them worldwide.

RUSSIAN ECONOMICS: You have two cows. You count them and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again and learn you have 17 cows. You give up counting and open another bottle of vodka.

CHINESE ECONOMICS: You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim full employment, high bovine productivity and arrest anyone reporting the actual numbers.

INDIAN ECONOMICS: You have two cows. You worship them.

BANGLADESH ECONOMICS: You have two cows. You don't know economy. You choose one of them as the Prime Minister of the country and the other as the Leader of the Opposition.